Copywriting Friday: Do you make these mistakes in job interviews?

Published: August 2024

Copywriting Friday highlights the tools and techniques of creating persuasive content. Enjoy.

Gary Bencivenga has been called “the Michelangelo of direct mail copywriting.” In this Copywriting Friday, we focus on the first 150 words of one of his ads from the 1990s.

People waiting for a job interview. — Bencivenga’s ad: We’ve highlighted the first 150 words, but you can see a full version here.

If the headline doesn’t particularly engage you, you’re already experiencing one of Bencivenga’s principles at work—calling out a hot audience.

Although this copy is 30 years old, it contains tools and techniques we can (and do) use to great effect today.

Analysis

The headline alone can teach us two important lessons.

Headline: Do you make these mistakes in job interviews?

First, there’s no cleverness here. Plain language almost always beats waffle, but these eight words also deliver on a key Bencivenga principle—calling out a “hot” audience in the headline.

The advert is selling a $49.95 mail-order report targeted at job seekers. The headline speaks directly and clearly to that audience and gets them asking questions.

We’ll save the headline’s second lesson for the end of the article and take a look at first short paragraph:

NEW YORK—Do you know why you should never eat a spinach salad when you’re being interviewed over lunch?

Although this version of the ad ran in USA Today, the “NEW YORK” prefix stamps a sense of authority, immediacy, and newsworthiness.

A small hit of pleasure, and then…

The question about spinach salad delivers a small hit of pleasure (because we know the answer), but then Bencivenga pulls the rug away:

If you’re a man, do you know why you should never wear a gold bracelet to a job interview?

Uh. No idea. Suddenly we feel less sure of ourselves. Suddenly… we have questions that can’t be answered without reading on. (In fact, these open loops will only be closed if you buy the product.)

Curiosity is a powerful (and sometimes overused) emotion, but it’s particularly effective when we can connect it to something people care about (like job-seeking). Bencivenga’s questions combine that with another trait of great copywriting—being visual and specific.

We all saw some version of that chunky gold bracelet. Great copywriters—like great novelists—bring readers into their world.

The lower paragraphs continue that process by adding a wider context and a hint of threat.

According to a new report, these are examples of innocent mistakes almost everyone makes when job-hunting. But they’re small potatoes compared to the most common mistake of all—not knowing how to position yourself as the #l candidate in an over-crowded field.

What’s the meta-message here?

You are making mistakes like this. It’s not your fault, but if you don’t wise up, you’ll never get that job you want.

After all, being the #1 candidate is the only way to get a job, isn’t it?

Nothing to argue with

Have you noticed how little the ad gives us to argue with? The copy contains no wild claims or empty-sounding promises. It proves there are gaps in our knowledge, draws a reasonable conclusion, and then amplifies the challenge we’re facing…

Here’s the problem. Competition for white-collar jobs has grown so fierce that a single help-wanted ad in a major newspaper can pull in 2,000 resumes. That’s seven large mail sacks bulging with resumes—from a single ad. How can you beat odds like that?

A more ordinary writer might describe the competition as “extreme” or “overwhelming,” but neither lend themselves to clear mental images. Bencivenga gives us “seven large mail sacks bulging with resumes” and a powerful reason to read on: How can you beat odds like that?

And if you do read the rest of the ad—as we highly recommend—you’ll see how Bencivenga devotes the remaining 900 words to answering that question.

The last lesson (and how to apply these techniques)

Earlier, we mentioned that the headline had another lesson to teach us. Here it is:

Borrow from the greats.

Like us, Bencivenga is a fan of studying what works. The headline for this ad was adapted from a Sherwin Cody original—“Do You Make These Mistakes in English?”

In his Marketing Bullet series, Bencivenga talks about Cody’s ad specifically:

“This headline was so strong, it was unbeatable for 40 years, outpulling every other ad that the world’s best copywriters could hurl against it.
“Can you adapt this powerhouse headline for your product? Sure you can. Every time I’ve adapted this headline to a product I wanted to promote, it’s given me a breakthrough.”

So, how might we follow Gary’s advice and incorporate his lessons into our emails, sales pages, and adverts? Here are five quick takeaways:

Call out your “hot audience” directly. (No one else matters.)
Forget clickbait; generate curiosity related to what your customers actually want.
Be visual and specific.
Once the reader is on your side, amplify the problem that you can help them solve.
Study what works (as you just did 🎉).

See you next time on Copywriting Friday.

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